A Look Into Why I Need to Use Wet Look Gel with Ian McShane
Ian McShane here.
When the good people of Hobo Bonobo asked me to write an article in their prestigious, ‘Look Into' section, I knew I'd hit the big time. And as they promised to give me my cat back afterwards, I was inspired to start writing straight away and to get little Tim back home and safe into my more than ample head of hair.
I'm sure you all know who I am by now, but despite my many follies I'm still most famous as tv's Lovejoy. If you don't remember Lovejoy, it was like Boon, only with antiques.
That should set thing straight now, but if it doesn't, here are a few tips I carry around in a small book to make sure I'm me.
a, I'm not Mike McShane - he's a big fella more popularly known for improvising hoedowns on tv's ‘Who's Line is it Anyway‘. However I did once take his hair and add it to my own lush thicket.
b, I'm also not Ian McKellan - he's an actor popular for playing the part of Robert Guillaume who played a character called Benson in the itv2 period drama, ‘The Fresh Prince of Bell End'.
If that still doesn't set things straight, I also hand out cards with this information on one side and a lock of my own ample home grown hair shreddies sellotaped to the other.
And so, on with the story.
As a youth I got a part time job in a hairdressing salon sweeping up and discarding floor hair in a hygienic fashion. Over time the salon became increasingly popular until they reached maximum capacity and were giving over 1.6 million haircuts a day. Alas and inevitably there came a day when the bin could take no more hair. Everybody needed results, and fast; and in true British tradition, the responsibility was passed down the chain until it could be passed no further and ended up in the hands of a little freckled faced ginger headed kid that was me. Unfortunately the sheer amount of pressure got too much; pony tails, excessive mutton chops and the poodle perm wouldn't be popular for another four years; and I had started loosing my own hair over the stress, not to mention my freckles which had by now become dark rugged lines so deep sunlight couldn't reach the bottom.
I was in an awful state; bald and about to lose my job. Then one night whilst asleep and in a fashion not dissimilar to a superhero film, I found myself stood over the bin of hair wearing nothing but a hair suit, staring into it's very soul; until, like a flash, a hairy hand and arm reached out from the murky depths of the bin and slapped it's hand on my head. Petrified, I stood there quivering like a garden gnome who's just caught a glimpse of a Suffolk Punch, (the king of lawnmowers) heading it's way. It was then that the bin spoke to me in it's booming voice, subtlety reminiscent to one of the bbc's approved current comedians. To this day I can't recall exactly what it said; but it spoke something mildly amusing and then proceeded to explain the joke and offer a visual representation of it in case I still hadn't, ‘got it'.
The next morning I got to work believing this to be a dream; but the bin was empty and it seemed all the hair in it had transferred itself on to my head giving me what's known by hairdressers today as the dark thicket of thatched glory; and every spring, many pilgrims come and visit the thicket to offer it their own hair as a sacrifice to it‘s splendour, not realising with every year that passes it grows bigger and darker until one day it will consume all light and plunge the world into perpetual twilight; and that my friends it why I need the wet look gel to tame the beast.
Now, back to the hoedown.
I'll need a place ?
The houses of parliament
A scenario ?
Massive corruption in the government and a country at melting point
An object ?
Madame la guillotine
And a person ‘s?
Nothing written on this site is intended to be true or factual, and none of the celebrities named in the 'Look Into' section have anything to do with this website. Their 'contributions' are entirely fictional and have been created by the authors of Hobo-Bonobo. The opinions expressed on Hobo-Bonobo.co.uk are not those of anyone, particularly not the people to whom they have been accredited.
Comments about This Article
NWa8s2 I really liked your blog article.Really looking forward to read more. Great. Comment By: free pron, 04 Mar 2017, Rating: 3/5
WxaoIj My brother suggested I may like this website. He used to be totally right. Comment By: More about the author, 01 Feb 2017, Rating: 1/5
pSrpoy Its hard to find good help I am forever proclaiming that its difficult to procure good help, but here is Comment By: suba hentai, 26 Nov 2016, Rating: 3/5
MljNY2 Thanks again for the article.Thanks Again. Much obliged. Comment By: free pron online, 11 Oct 2016, Rating: 1/5
JDz5rO In fact no matter if someone doesn at be aware of afterward its up Comment By: best pron, 04 Aug 2016, Rating: 1/5
uJLkyq Perfectly written written content , thankyou for selective information. Comment By: pork movies, 05 Jul 2016, Rating: 1/5
nTG9rp This is really interesting, You are a very skilled blogger. I ave joined your feed and look forward to seeking more of your great post. Also, I have shared your website in my social networks! Comment By: porn videos, 16 May 2016, Rating: 1/5
Whoa! This blog looks just like my old one! It as on a completely different topic but it has pretty much the same page layout and design. Excellent choice of colors! Comment By: porn videos, 13 May 2016, Rating: 2/5
gRFh6q This is one awesome article post. Fantastic. Comment By: fiverr editor, 06 Apr 2016, Rating: 3/5
7EwRqU Really appreciate you sharing this blog.Much thanks again. Comment By: cocoservice, 29 Feb 2016, Rating: 3/5
tzhdyo I think this is a real great article. Cool. Comment By: crorkservice fiverr, 30 Jan 2016, Rating: 2/5
v8OGWb Comment By: vYHCFgaOKMrORZR, 01 Jan 2016, Rating: 1/5
X5GSPY I view something really special in this web site. Comment By: crorkservice fiverr, 28 Nov 2015, Rating: 1/5
oYLLTe Very excellent information can be found on blog. Comment By: crork, 10 Nov 2015, Rating: 3/5
ntLVYQ Great article post.Really looking forward to read more. Keep writing. Comment By: crork service, 16 Oct 2015, Rating: 4/5
SHKv6b You, my pal, ROCK! I found exactly the info I already searched all over the place and just could not locate it. What an ideal web site. Comment By: alex crork, 02 Sep 2015, Rating: 3/5
jAmTDR My brother suggested I might like this website. He was totally right. This post actually made my day. You can not imagine just how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks! Comment By: com crorkzz, 03 Aug 2015, Rating: 4/5
mbqvtT Thanks for sharing, this is a fantastic blog post. Comment By: backlinks service, 30 Jun 2015, Rating: 1/5
z78OvJ Awesome blog post.Much thanks again. Great. Comment By: crorkzz mattz, 09 Jun 2015, Rating: 1/5
X3hJzV Whats up! I just want to give an enormous thumbs up for the great information you have got here on this post. I can be coming back to your blog for extra soon. Comment By: crorkzz, 29 May 2015, Rating: 2/5
KEG0lx Wow! This can be one particular of the most helpful blogs We have ever arrive across on this subject. Basically Magnificent. I am also an expert in this topic therefore I can understand your effort. Comment By: crorkservice, 05 May 2015, Rating: 2/5
Dh0O7S fantastic post, very informative. I wonder why the other experts of this sector don't notice this. You should continue your writing. I am confident, you've a great readers' base already! Comment By: nick crorkz, 07 Apr 2015, Rating: 4/5
RxIT7P Normally I don't read article on blogs, but I would like to say that this write-up very pressured me to try and do so! Your writing style has been amazed me. Thanks, very nice post. Comment By: matt daemon, 07 Mar 2015, Rating: 1/5
HXCLDd Of course, what a fantastic blog and illuminating posts, I definitely will bookmark your website.Best Regards! Comment By: crorkz linkz, 16 Jan 2015, Rating: 3/5
qNd4Nh I appreciate you sharing this post.Much thanks again. Awesome. Comment By: crorkz, 06 Aug 2014, Rating: 2/5
I8sPjA I cannot thank you enough for the article post.Much thanks again. Will read on... Comment By: matzcrorkz, 06 Aug 2014, Rating: 1/5
oS4d4l I loved your blog post.Really looking forward to read more. Will read on... Comment By: crorkz matz, 05 Aug 2014, Rating: 2/5
fnG2qx Great blog article.Really thank you! Cool. Comment By: crorkz, 04 Aug 2014, Rating: 2/5
4QggQy A big thank you for your blog article.Really looking forward to read more. Really Cool. Comment By: cheap backlinks, 17 Jul 2014, Rating: 4/5
CQPdrU Very good post.Thanks Again. Much obliged. Comment By: awesome seo, 04 Jul 2014, Rating: 4/5
58k8MB Muchos Gracias for your post.Really looking forward to read more. Fantastic. Comment By: awesome seo, 17 Jun 2014, Rating: 4/5
xoI76T Great, thanks for sharing this article.Really looking forward to read more. Really Cool. Comment By: awesome seo solutions, 04 Jun 2014, Rating: 4/5
lcKRNB wow, awesome article post.Really thank you! Much obliged. Comment By: nice seo guys, 12 May 2014, Rating: 2/5
ML2CNB I loved your blog post.Really looking forward to read more. Comment By: awesome things!, 17 Apr 2014, Rating: 3/5
ydMyJZ Looking forward to reading more. Great blog article.Thanks Again. Want more. Comment By: check it out, 22 Mar 2014, Rating: 1/5
y1KdxC I really enjoy the blog. Want more. Comment By: awesome things!, 28 Feb 2014, Rating: 3/5
MHYCVz Really enjoyed this blog article.Thanks Again. Awesome. Comment By: nice seo guys, 18 Jan 2014, Rating: 2/5
OjPsme Great, thanks for sharing this article post.Really looking forward to read more. Awesome. Comment By: seo service, 14 Dec 2013, Rating: 4/5
1EuYWQ Very good blog post. Cool. Comment By: take a look at it!, 01 Nov 2013, Rating: 4/5
ohQ680 Thanks so much for the post. Want more. Comment By: take a look at it!, 24 Oct 2013, Rating: 1/5
LwNfNj Appreciate you sharing, great blog article.Really thank you! Keep writing. Comment By: check out these guys!, 15 Oct 2013, Rating: 1/5
PhXgXQ Muchos Gracias for your blog.Really thank you! Want more. Comment By: cheap link building, 24 Sep 2013, Rating: 3/5
ACcLfd I really liked your post.Thanks Again. Much obliged. Comment By: make money online, 13 Sep 2013, Rating: 1/5
XfyTpv Major thanks for the article.Thanks Again. Much obliged. Comment By: the best seo service, 06 Sep 2013, Rating: 1/5