Hello, I'm George Lucas. I'm at the Cannes film festival in France, near Germany, next to Spain, nowhere near California. When the folks at Hobo Bonobo (Namely Ted) asked me to write a piece for their website, I thought I'd write about what I know best. Movie-making, Or as you English call it, filmmaking, or as Jar Jar Binks would call it, "me-sa make-a movie-a!!"
Filmmaking is a long and arduous process. Blood, sweat and tears are spilled onto the soundstages and locations used, actors are taken on a roller coaster of emotion, and the pilot of all these rides is usually the director (usually me).
It's like making a baby, and as much love and attention is given to it. First there's the script (courting) then you get the actors together and rehearse (foreplay) and then you get the script on film (Hot pumping action), then the reviews (in my case divorce and possibly jail for spousal abuse).
I remember when I made Star Wars in 1977, the world was a different place, and no one wanted to know about Luke’s adventures. In fact when I used to tell people about it they'd react in different ways, my buddy Spielberg said it sounded great, most other people didn’t care, five walked out on my pitch and two cried. It was just like when I suggested Episode II, except with that, two people said it was good. Everyone else cried so I had them shot into the sun, and as usual I turned out to be right, because Attack of the Clones really is a concise piece of storytelling. And filmmaking.
I have always believed that Star Wars changed the way we look at sci-fi films today, I mean you remember that in the 70’s Sci-fi was mainly an excuse for women to take their tops off and run around with their wobblers out (or as jar jar would say, "shes a meesa gotta boobies out!!!") whilst being chased by a man wrapped in aluminium foil, or as you English say, aluminium.
When I came up with the idea of revisiting the story in 1997 (although of course really I knew all along that one day I would make Episodes I - III, just like I always knew that Vader was Luke's father. Yeah.) it occurred to me that there was room to make some of the changes to the things that had bothered me since ’77. Namely digitally removing some plot devices, something I've also used in the prequels. At my Skywalker ranch in California I have a machine called the D.P.D.R. (Digital Plot Device Remover). I simply write a very good script and place it into the machine (which acts like a photocopier) and it comes out the other end as "The Phantom Penace" or "Howard the Duck" which was also a great movie. For example, when I wrote Episode I, there was no Jar Jar, no Pod race, just a tight plot about the galactic chips shortage (crisps), women drivers, the disabled and and a plot twist centered (or "centred") around Obi Wan losing his reading glasses. Princess Leia was originally written as a small chinchilla that ate shoes worn by Broadway performers, but I changed it at the last minute, luckily.
Anyway, I hope this has been enlightening, I'm off to finish the script to "Indiana Jones and the Tits of Death" which will be out in the fall (jumping out of the window hopefully) of 2006. Harrison has agreed to do it, and because of his age we’ve decided to set it in 1979, where we can get away with Indy being 87.
May The Force Be With Me.
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